Wednesday, January 9, 2008

On Astrophysics and the Universe...

(Okay this post really isn't really about Astrophysics, I just couldn't figure a good title for this post.)

Here is what it's really about.

What do you do when you like someone a lot and you over time get the feeling that they don't really like you? I have a feeling that someone I really like and admire, for some reason doesn't really like me. I feel like she only tolerates me because we travel in the same circles.

I've gone out of may way on several occasions to let her know that I think she is a really great person. And I do think she's a great person.

So does she think of me as a sycophant?

Recently I noticed that she has embraced certain people who I am close to but she still makes it clear in a very subtle way that she doesn't want to embrace me in that same way.

So I'm sad and hurt. I've invested a lot of time in the relationship, such as it is, and feel cheated. Yesterday I came to the conclusion that I should simply back off.

I feel like I have been pushing myself on her and that's a terrible feeling.

I really hate how I'm feeling. On the one hand I feel childish. I feel childish because I feel jealous. I feel as though this person has gotten close to a few people that I may have introduced her to and now I'm being shunned.

Anyway I needed to vent. I needed to say something about this because it is really bothering me.

Thanks for listening.

Do you think I'm being stupid and childish? Should I talk to her about this or just back-off?

16 comments:

homelandcolors said...

Don't sweat it, the person's not worth being frustrated over.

All-Mi-T [Thought Crime] Rawdawgbuffalo said...

a good title would have been QUARKS, QUASARS AND GLUONS

clnmike said...

Give space.
Anything else looks needy and not worthy of respect. Hell you could even play high post and just ignore her from now on.

Lisa Johnson said...

I don't know if it's stupid or childish, because it happens to all of us no matter our age. I think it's just being human. I used to have hope that people stopped these type games when we got "old and mature enough" until I visited my grandmother in a nursing home and saw the same thing happening! It never ends!

I agree with backing off. If she doesn't appreciate you, that's her problem. And by the way, the title of the post really caught my attention! : )

wisdomteachesme said...

mdc,
backing off and remembering who you are is best when situations like this happen. your life is taking a different path and she is not part of it.

i see more for you because of her actions/re-actions and, non-actions. and what you have detailed is saying more about her lack of integrity as a person than it does about how good a person she is.

childish maybe in the sense that you are being shown areas of your character that are being built up-matured-pruned away.
being strengthen for the future places we are going is great. but even better is being fully aware of what is occuring within us so that we can reap and glean completely.

it's ok to feel hurt-expressing emotion is human-but not to be confused with being controlled by one's emotions, this is negative and will lead to more mess.

growth and wisdom will be reaped if sought.
just treat her with compassion and kindness-let it be true, from your heart. and feel no lack in your life from her or anyone else's presence not being within your life.

thank you for venting (and not acting on it), so in the troubles of one persons life we will find hope and answers for helping ourselves-by having the eyes to see the answers.

Julie said...

Oh, have I been there. And what I've generally found is that the other person has their own hang-ups or insecurities that have nothing at all to do with me.

Really, stupid stuff, like their marriage is having problems and they think that mine looks like it's going well. Or I look like a friend who she had problems with in elementary school. Or one of a bunch of other odd insecurities people have. 'Cause you know there's always the, "I don't want to be friends with anyone who really wants to be friends with me," syndrome. And you just can't fight that.

And sometimes you can never find out just what it is because the other person keeps you at enough of a distance that it's clear that to even talk about it would make her vulnerable. And people don't like letting their guard down around someone who they already don't feel comfortable with.

It's kind of a catch-22 situation because in order for her to tell you why she doesn't embrace you, she'd have to make herself vulnerable - and you only get vulnerable with people you feel close to.

I think you've let her know that you think she's a good person to have as a friend. Now is probably the time to just back off and let it be. Maybe she'll come around on her own.

wisdomteachesme said...

oh, and to answer your other question, no it does not make you a syncophant.

Brianna said...

I would say just leave it alone. I'm sure you feel this way for a reason and I'm not so sure what would be gained by expressing it to her, because honestly--what would she really say? I doubt that it would give you any clarification or make you feel any better if she could even come up with a reason at all.

You tried. Her loss.

Ehav Ever said...

I don't think you are being childish, I think you are being human. It is quite normal to have the desire to be close to people you admire. It is also normal for there to be times when one person feels one way, but another person doesn't feel the same.

I used to find myself in similar situations to what you described. Mostly towards women that I liked, but the feelings were not mutual. What I found was sometimes I was trying to come close to people who I really wasn't compatible with at the expense of drawing away from people I was compatible with.

My conclusion was that I needed to be more concerned with the feelings of others sometimes. Just because I like a person and crave some of their attention doesn't mean that they must return those feelings. Everyone has their likes, dislikes, concerns, and preferences so those people have the right to not desire my friendship, my company, or my emotions.

Just look at it from this angle. Not long ago you posted about a co-worker that you heard liked you, but your feelings were not the same. So maybe he is somewhere thinking the same kind of thoughts you are about the person who friendship you desire. Often when we find ourselves in compromising situations like this, we also have to consider that there may be people feeling the same way towards us.

Mes Deux Cents said...

HC,

Maybe but it will take me some time to actually believe that.

_____________________________________

Torrance,

I'd have to google Gluons.

___________________________________

ClnMike,

I don't dislike her, so I wouldn't want to ignore her. But I get your point.
___________________________________

Anali,

Wow, in a retirement home, that's not good.

Backing off seems to be the best move.

Lol, Astrophysics just poped into my head, that's weird.

___________________________________

WTM,

"just treat her with compassion and kindness-let it be true"

That's great advice. I don't like being resentful.

Thanks for listening to my vent!
___________________________________

FL,

You make a really great point; it could have nothing to do with me. She could just be going through something.

Another vote for backing off!
___________________________________

WTM,

Thanks, I was a little worried about that.

___________________________________

Brianna,

Yeah what would she say; she probably wouldn't be direct if I did talk to her, so what would be the point.

I did try, so oh well.
___________________________________


Ehav,

I guess there could be a comparison with my carpool friend.

Black Wombmyn Chat said...

I agree with everyone's advice regarding this situation and I admire your bravery and your quest for knowledge.

Everyone has their own reasons for why they are attracted to certain people in their lives (or not). We can't control another's thoughts or manipulate them to see that we are 'good people' or 'worthy to be around.'

We simply have to live with the decisions they make, and in turn others have to live with ours.

We are all free.

Ann Brock said...

Mes Deux Cents any time you have to ask about a relationship your heart has already spoken. Listen to your heart, our heart is always right even when our head says something different. Good post.

Mes Deux Cents said...

DMB,

Your right, we do have to live with other people's choices.

I guess it's about accepting things we can't change.

___________________________________

JJ B,

You are absolutly right, my head was trying to over-rule my heart.

Jackie said...

I've been there. I actually found that the person I wanted to be more close to, actually did love and value me but as DMB says it's their decision how close they want to be. You can't force it.
Once you accept this it may help a bit with the jealousy and self doubts and even create a freedom space for growth in the relationship. It hurts and it's hard And MDC, it's her loss. So there!

SheWhoLives said...

Sometimes you just gotta back off, accept, and trust that everything is exactly as it should be. I am sure this person has their reasons for keeping a distance - but what those are are not your concern.

Focus on the people who have the pleasure of enjoying the fullness of your friendship; forget about those not interested.

Mes Deux Cents said...

Jackie,

That's true, I can't force it. I think I'm coming to terms with that.

lol, Yep it is her loss!

Thanks

_____________________________________

Shelly,


"everything is exactly as it should be"

Those are words to live by.

Thanks

MDC's Library

1720 Entertainment (1) 1983 DeTomaso Pantera (1) 2007 (1) 2007 Best Videos (1) 2007 Track and Field World Championships (4) 2007 WNBA Conference Finals (1) 2007 WNBA Finals (5) 2007 WNBA Western Conference Finals (1) 2007 World Track and Field Championships (1) 2008 Beijing Olympic Games (1) 2008 Grammy Awards (2) 2008 Presidential Race (28) 2008 Resolutions (1) 2008 Super Bowl (1) 3 A.M. (1) 3LW- No More (1) 59th Street Bridge (1) 7 Star Hotel (1) 7 Train (2) A Beautiful Face (2) A Beautiful Picture (131) A Cute Picture (1) A funny picture (2) A House is not a Home (1) A Rainy Day (1) A Raisin in the Sun (1) A Tribe Called Quest Leaders of the New School (1) A Week Of Positive Blogging (9) A-Ha - Take On Me (1) Aaliyah (7) Aaliyah - Christmas in Washington (1997) (1) Aaliyah We Miss You (1) Africa (1) African American Aviation (1) African American Churches (1) African American Enslavement (1) African American History (3) African American Men (1) African Americans and Cable T.V. (2) Agra (1) Airbus A380 (1) Al B. Sure - Nite And Day (1) Albuquerque (1) Alexander O'Neal and Cherelle - Saturday Love (1) Alice Smith (4) Alice Smith - Dream (Live) (1) Alicia Keys (7) Alicia Myers - I Want To Thank You (1) Allegory (1) Allyson Felix (3) AM Radio (1) Amazon.com (1) Amel Larrieux (2) America Ferrera (1) Amii Stewart - Knock on Wood (1) Amsterdam (2) Amtrak (1) Amy Winehouse (7) Amy Winehouse - Love Is A Losing Game (1) Amy Winehouse - Moody's Mood For Love (1) and Mary (1) And this is what I think about that... (1) Angel Lola Luv (2) Angela Bofill - I Try (1) Angela Y Davis (1) Angelina-Jolie (2) Antarctica (1) Arbor Day (1) Arc de Triomphe (2) Aresenio Hall (1) Aretha Franklin - Bridge Over Troubled Water (1) Aretha Franklin - Until You Come Back To Me (1) Arizona (1) Arrested Development - Tennessee (1) Art (3) Ask This Black Woman (1) Assata Shakur Part One (1) Assata Shakur Part Two (1) Astoria (1) Athletics (1) Atlanta (4) Attallah Shabazz (1) August 28 - 1963 (1) Australia (2) Autumn (1) Aviation (1) Bad Photoshopping (1) Balances By Nikki Giovanni (1) Bandy Bandy (1) Barack and Michelle (1) Barack Obama (11) Barak Obama (2) Barbara Mason - Another Man (1) Bart Simpson (1) Basia - New Day for You (1) Beautiful Earth (1) Beautiful Italy (1) Beautiful Moon Over Spain (1) Beautiful Photo (1) Beautiful Puerto Rico (1) Beautiful Rome (1) Before dawn (1) Being Prepared (1) Belgium (1) Ben Harper (1) Benazir Bhutto (2) Bermuda (1) Bessie Coleman (1) BET (1) BET/ Viacom (7) Beverly Johnson (1) BeyoncĆ© (1) Bill Clinton (1) Bill Cosby (1) Bill O'Reilly (1) Billary (3) Billet-doux (1) Billie Holiday (2) Bills (1) Billy Ocean - Caribbean Queen (1) Birthdays (1) Black and Green Flag (1) Black Blog Rankings (2) Black Fire White Fire (1) Black History Month (21) Black Sea (1) Black Women (3) Black Women Vote (1) Black Women's Roundtable (1) Black-Eyed Peas (1) BlackAndMarriedWithKids (1) Blogger Protest (3) Blogger Tag (4) Blogging (14) Blogging Break (1) Blogs I love (2) Blogs I Read (3) BlogTalkRadio (1) BOB (Bombs Over Baghdad) (1) Bob Marley (1) Bob Marley - Redemption Song (1) Bob Marley and The Wailers (1) Bobby Caldwell What You Won't Do For Love (1) Bobby Womack - If You Think You're Lonely Now (1) Bonnie Raitt - Something To Talk About (1) Books (3) Bora Bora French Polynesia (1) BoringBlackChick (2) Boston (3) Boycotts (1) Boz Scaggs - Lowdown (1) Brandy - I Wanna Be Down (1) Brasil (1) Breast Cancer (1) Brehat Island (1) Britney Spears (1) Brixton (1) Brooklyn Bridge (1) Browngirl (1) Brownstone (2) Brussels at Nightfall (1) Brussels Belgium at night (1) Bucky Done Gun (1) Buenos Aires At Night (1) Burj Al-Arab Hotel (1) Burqa (1) Bus (2) Bush Clinton Dynasty (2) C-Bank - One more shot (1) Cable T.V. (1) CafĆ© Society (1) California (3) California Attorney General (1) Calloway with The Nicholas Brothers - Jumpin' Jive (1) Cape Town SA (1) Cappie Pondexter (6) Carnival (2) Cathay Williams (1) CBS Corp. (1) Celia Cruz (1) Cell Phones (1) Central Park at Night (1) Chaka Khan (1) Champagne (1) Champs-ElysĆ©es (1) Change featuring Luther Vandross - The Glow Of Love (1) Character Corner (2) Charles Barkley (1) Charlotte - North Carolina (1) Cheaters (1) Chemotherapy (1) Cheryl Lynn - Encore (1) Chesapeake Bay Bridge (1) Chic - I Want Your Love (1) Chicago (2) Chicago at night (1) China (3) China's Support Of Genocide In Dafur (2) Chris Isaac - Wicked Game (1) Chrisette Michelle (1) Christina Aguilera - Beautiful (1) Christine Arron (1) Christine Beatty (1) Christmas (8) Christmas Day (2) Christmas Music (3) Christmas Party (1) Christopher Williams - I'm Dreamin' (1) Chubb Rock - Treat 'em Right (1) Chudney Ross (1) Church (1) Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (1) Ciara - Get Up (1) Cindy Blackman (1) Cities (2) Cities I like (1) Clear Channel Communications (1) Cloned Meat (1) Club Nouveau - Why you treat me so bad (1) College (1) Colonel Abrams -Trapped (1) Color Preference Test (1) Comment War (1) Comments (2) Common Sense (1) Community (1) Conflict (1) Consumerism (1) Conya Doss (1) Cora Brown (1) Corinne Bailey Rae (1) Corinne Bailey Rae - Like A Star (1) Corrine Bailey Rae (1) Costa Rica (1) Country Music (1) Courtney and Angela (1) Crazy Comments (1) Creedence Clearwater Revival - Bad Moon Rising (1) Crime (1) Cristal champagne (1) Cuba (2) Culture (1) Cynda Williams - Harlem Blues (1) Cynthia Tucker (2) Dallas (2) Dana Owens (1) Dance Theatre of Harlem (1) Dance Thursday Rerun with the Lockers (1) Dance Thursday The Challenge - Gregory Hines and Sammy Davis (1) Darfur (1) Das Efx - They Want Efx (1) dave brubeck take five (1) Dave Matthews Band - Crash Into Me (1) De La Soul - Me (1) DeBarge - Stay With Me (1) Debit Card (1) Debra Laws with Ronnie Laws - Special (1) Deele - Two Occasions (1) Delaware State University (1) Delegates Count (1) Dennis Edwards - Don't Look Any Further (1) Dennis Kucinich (1) Denroy Morgan - I'll Do Anything for You (1) Denzel (3) Deon Estus (1) Destiny's Child (1) Detroit (1) Detroit Shock (1) Dexter Gordon (1) Diana and Flo (1) Diana Taurasi (2) Did you know (1) Dionne Farris - Hopeless (1) Dionne Warwick (1) DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince - Summertime (1) DJ Kool - Let Me Clear My Throat (1) DjennĆ© (1) Donny Hathaway - This Christmas (1) Dorothy Dandridge (1) Dr. Buzzard's Original Savannah Band - Sunshower (1) DST (1) Dubai (1) DĆ¼sseldorf by Night (1) Economy (1) Ecuador (1) Eddie Murphy (1) Eddy Grant - Electric Avenue (1) Edmonia Lewis (1) Edwyn Collins - A Girl Like You (1) Egypt (1) Ehav Ever (1) Eiffel from the Seine River (1) Elaine Brown (1) Electronic Village (3) email (1) En Vogue - Hold On (1) Enigma - Sadness (1) Enya - Orinoco Flow (1) Erykah Badu (2) ESPN (1) Essence (1) Essential Presence (5) Ethiopia (2) Etienne Aigner (1) EurWeb.com (1) Eve - Tambourine (1) Evelyn "Champagne" King - Betcha She Don't Love You (1) Exploitation (1) Fabulous Is A Choice (1) Faith Evans - You Used To Love Me (1) Fall (1) Fall Fashion (1) Falling In Love (1) FAME (1) Family (1) Fashion (1) Faux - Heterosexuality (1) FCC (1) Feelings (1) Fiji Islands (2) File (1) Film (3) Final Post For Now (1) Finding Jesus (1) Five Questions (1) Five Star - Let Me Be the One (1) Flashdance (1) Flava Flav (1) Flea Markets (2) Floetry (1) Floods Across Africa (1) FM Radio (1) Fog (2) Fond Memories (1) Fonda Rae - Over Like a Fat Rat (1) Food (3) Food Recall (1) Force MD's - Tender Love (1) France (2) Frances Ellen Watkins Harper (2) Frank (1) Frankie Crocker (1) Frankie Smith - Double Dutch Bus (1) Freddie Jackson - Rock Me Tonight (1) Freetown Christiania (1) Frida Kahlo (1) Friday Rare Groove: Chuckii Booker - Turned Away (1) Friday Rare Groove: Joyce Sims - All and All (1) Friendship (2) Fruit (1) Fugees (2) Gene Anthony Ray (1) General Electric (1) Genocide (1) George Bush (2) George Kranz - Din Da Da (1) Germany (1) Gibson Brothers - Cuba (1) Giovanca -Joyride (1) Girls (1) Giving (1) Glamour Magazine (1) Global Warming (1) Goapele (1) Goapele - Closer (1) Golden Globes (1) Good Morning America (1) GOP (1) Government (5) Grace Jones - Pull Up To The Bumper (1) Greece (1) Greenwich Village (1) Gregory Abbott - Shake You Down (1) Groceries (1) Groove Theory (1) Gulf of Tonkin (1) Gwen Guthrie - It Should Have Been You (1) Gwen Stefani (1) Hair (1) Halifax (1) Hall and Oates - I Can't Go For That (No Can Do) (1) Halle Berry (1) Halloween (1) Hanukkah (1) Happiness (1) Happy Birthday Aaliyah... (1) Happy New Year 2008 (2) Harajuku Girls (1) Harajuku Station (1) Harold Melvin and the Blue Notes (1) Harper's Bazaar Japan (1) Havana (1) Havana Cuba (2) HBCU (2) Heaven Help Me (1) heteronyms (1) heterophones (1) HickTownPress (1) Highland Ave (1) Hillary Clinton (5) Hip Hop (2) Hip Hop Be Bop (Don't Stop) (1) Hippies (1) Historic Moments (1) Holiday (3) Holland (1) Hollywood Blvd (1) Hollywood CA (1) Home (2) Homeland Security (1) HomelandColors (2) Homophones (1) Hong Kong At Night (2) Hootie And The Blowfish - Hold My Hand (1) Hope That We Can Be Together Soon (1) House Party - Dance off: Kid and Play (Music: Ain't My Type Of Hype - Full Force) (1) Houses (1) Human League - Don't You Want Me Baby (1) Hurricane Katrina (1) Hwy 101 (1) I Am Legend (1) I Hate Rap Rant (1) I have a question (3) I hope (1) I Love Music (1) I smell the 80's (1) I Want This (1) Ibiza Spain (1) Iceland (1) Idioms (1) If you love me (1) IFC (1) Imagination - Just an Illusion (1) Iman (1) Indai.Arie (1) Indeep - Last Night A DJ Saved My Life (1) India (1) Indian Ocean (1) Inner City - Big Fun (1) Inner Life - I'm caught up (1) Interesting Music (1) Interesting Photo (1) Interestingness (1) Iowa (2) ipod (3) Iran (1) Irene Morgan Kirkaldy (1) Isiah Thomas (1) Isla Verde Beach (1) It's In The eyes (1) It's Ndel's World; You're Just Reading It (1) Italy (1) itunes (1) Jackie Moore - This Time Baby (1) Jade - Don't Walk Away (1) Jamaica (1) James "D-Train" Williams- Keep On (1) James Brown Lyrics - Say It Loud (I'm Black and I'm Proud) (1) Jamiroquai - Space Cowboy (1) Janelle MonĆ”e (1) Janet Jackson - Rhythm Nation (1) January 16 (1) Japan (1) Jay Z (1) jazzfm (1) Jazzyfatnastees (1) Jean Baylor (1) Jean-Michel Basquiat (1) Jeb Bush In 2012 (1) Jeff Goldblum (1) Jena6 (1) Jennifer Beals (2) Jermaine Jackson - Do What You Do (1) Jermaine Stewart - Word is Out (1) Jimmy Jam (1) Jimmy Scott (1) Joan Armatrading (5) Joan Armatrading - Love And Affection (1) Jody Watley Still a Thrill (1) Joe Public - Live and learn (1) Joe Ski Love - Pee Wee Dance (1) Joffrey Ballet (1) John Coltrane (2) John Edwards (1) John Howard Payne (1) John Legend Corinne Bailey Rae (1) John McCain (1) John Wayne (1) Johnny Was (1) Jonathan Butler - Lies (1) Jr. (1) Jr. from the film Tap (1) Juanita Bynum (1) Judge Hatchett (1) Juneteenth (1) Junior - Mama Used To Say (1) JURNEE SMOLLETT (1) Justice (1) Justin D. Ross (1) Kamala Harris (1) Kano - I'm Ready (1) Karen Alexander (1) Karen Young - Hot Shot (1) Karyn White featuring Babyface - Love Saw It (1) Kashif and Meli'sa Morgan - Love Changes (1) Kathleen Neal Cleaver (1) Kauai Hawaii (1) keith sweat - Make it Last Forever feat Jackie McGhee (1) Kelis - Caught Out There (1) Kenya (2) Keyshia Cole (1) KFC (1) Kiva (1) Kraftwerk - Trans Europe Express (1) Kuala Lumpur (1) Kuala Lumpur Malaysia (1) Kumari Fulbright (1) Kwanzaa (1) La Flavour - Mandolay (1) Labor Day (1) Laguna Beach (1) Lake Como (1) Lake Michigan (1) Lake Powell (1) Las Vegas Nevada (1) Latin Quarter (1) Lauren Hill (1) Lauryn Hill (2) Lauryn Hill - Little Drummer Boy (1) Law Enforcement (1) Led Zeppelin (1) Led Zeppelin - All My Love (1) Ledisi (2) Leela James (1) Leela James - Music (1) Left Eye (1) Lennox Lewis (1) Lenny Kravitz (2) Lenny Kravitz - Are you Gonna go my way featuring Cindy Blackman on Drums (1) Les Champs-ƉlysĆ©es (1) Les Nubians (1) Lily Allen (1) Link-O-Rama (22) Lisa Bonet (2) Lisa Fischer - How Can I Ease The Pain (1) Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam - Lost in Emotion (1) Lisa Stansfield - All Around The World (1) Lisbon Portugal (1) List (1) Lists (3) Live Concert (2) Living Out Loud (1) Liya Kebede (3) LL Cool J - I Need Love (1) Local News (1) Local Radio (1) Locavore (1) London (2) Long lost Friends (1) Loose Ends - Slow down (1) Lorraine Hansberry (1) Los Angeles at night (1) Los Angelista's Guide To The Pursuit Of Happiness (2) Love (2) Love De-Luxe - Here comes that sound (1) Love is alosing game (1) LTD - (Everytime I Turn Around) Back In Love Again (1) Luther Vandross (5) Luther Vandross - Your Secret Love (1) Lydia Abarca (1) M.I.A. (Maya Arulpragasam) (1) M|A|R|R|S - Pump Up the Volume (1) Machine (1) Madison (1) Mahalia Jackson - Amazing Grace (1) Major Harris (1) Major Robert Henry Lawrence (1) Malcolm and Betty (1) Malcolm and Martin (1) Malcolm Mclaren - Buffalo Girls (1) Mali (1) Man Parrish (1) March on Washington (1) Mardi Gras (1) Mariah Carey - Vision of Love (2) Mariah Carey - We Belong Together (1) Marion Jones (4) Marlena Shaw (2) Marshall Jefferson - Move your Body (1) Martha's Vineyard (1) Martin and Coretta (1) Martin Laurence (1) Martinique (1) Marvin Gaye (1) Mary J Blige - Just Fine (1) Mary J. Blige (1) Matisyahu (1) Matisyahu King Without A Crown (Live At Stubb's) (1) Maui (1) Mauritius (1) Mavericks Surf Contest (1) Maxi Priest - Close to you (1) Maxwell - Ascension (Don't Ever Wonder) (1) Maze (1) Maze featuring Frankie Beverly - Joy and Pain (1) MC Hammer (1) MC Lyte - Lyte As A Rock (1) McFadden and Whitehead - Aint No Stopping Us Now (1) MDC Dictionary (1) Me (1) Media (15) Media hearings Negative Depictions of African American Women (1) Mel and Kim - Showing Out (1) Mes Deux Cents (1) Meseret Defar (1) Meshell Ndegeochello (1) Mexico (1) MFSB - Love Is The Message (1) Miami at night (1) Michael Jackson (1) Michael Jackson - Ben (1) Michael Vick (3) Midnight Star - Curious (1) Milan - Italy (1) Milli Vanilli - Blame It On The Rain (1) Minnie Riperton - Memory Lane (1) Minority relations (1) Minstel Show (1) Missing African American Women (7) Missing Persons (2) Mitt Romney for President (2) MLK (2) MLK Day (6) Mo Better Blues (1) Models (1) Mombasa (1) Monday (1) Money (2) MontrĆ©al (1) Montreal in autumn clothes (1) Moody's Mood for Love (1) Morehouse College (1) Mormons and Blacks (1) Morning (1) Morocco (1) Mothers (1) Mount Fuji (1) Mount Kilimanjaro (1) Mr Softie Ice Cream (1) MrsGrapevine (2) MSNBC (1) MTV (1) Music (9) Music Downloads (1) Music Saturday (11) Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie (1) My Orchid (2) My Original Writing (5) Myself and I (1) N.Y. Giants (2) N.Y.C (6) NAACP (2) Nailah Franklin (5) Nancy Sinatra (1) Nashville (1) Natalie Merchant (1) Natalie Merchant - Carnival (1) Natasha Bedingfield - Unwritten (1) National Secretaries Day (1) Native Americans (1) Natural Disaster (1) NBA (1) NBC (1) Negative Depictions Of Women Of Color (3) Negative Propaganda (2) Nena - 99 Luftballoons (1) Neo-Soul (1) Netherlands (1) Neutrogena Hand Cream (1) New Black Woman (1) New Edition - Boys to Men (1) New England Patriots (1) New Hampshire (1) New Jack City (1) New Jersey (1) New Jersey Turnpike (1) New Mexico (1) New Release (1) New York Citi Peech Boyz Don't Make Me Wait (1) New York City (3) News (11) News Corp. (1) NFL (1) Niagara Falls (2) Nicole Willis (2) No Woman No Cry (1) Nokulunga Buthelezi (1) Norah Jones (3) Notable Quotables (2) Nova Scotia (2) NPR (6) Nu Shooz I Can't Wait (1) NYC (2) O.J. Simpson (1) Odds and Ends (1) Odin (1) Offensive Cable Programming (1) Olbrich Gardens (1) Oleta Adams - Get Here (1) On Beauty (1) On Blogging (1) On... (18) One Of My Favorite People (4) Oprah (3) Orchids (3) Oregon (1) Oscars (1) OutKast (1) P.M. Dawn - Set Adrift On Memory Bliss (1) Paganism (1) Palindromes (1) Panic (1) Paris (9) Passion (2) Patrick Hernandez - Born to be alive (1) PBS (3) PCH (1) Peace On Earth (1) Pebbles - Mercedes Boy (1) Personal Day (1) Pet Shop Boys - West End Girls (1) PETA (1) Peter Brown - Do You Wanna Get Funky With Me? (1) Petronas Towers (2) Pfc. LaVena Johnson (1) Phalaenopsis Orchid (2) Phoenix Mercury (1) Photo Art (2) Photo Art Friday (3) Phyllis Hyman (5) Places I Would Like To Visit (1) Poetry (3) politics (3) Pookie (1) Pop and Politics (1) Pop Quiz (2) Portland (1) Portugal (1) Press play (2) Protest (4) Public Transportation (1) Puerto Rico (1) Purple Sky (1) Q1 Review (1) Queen Latifah (1) Queens (1) Questions (1) Quincy Jones - The Secret Garden (1) quizzes (1) Quotes (2) R and B (1) Racism (1) Radio (2) Radio Announcer (1) Radio D.J. New York City (1) Rainforest (1) Raising Victor Vargas (1) Ralph Nader (1) Rap Music (2) Rap Video Vixens (1) Ray Parker Jr - A Woman Needs Love (1) Re Posts (1) Reading (1) Ready for the World - Love You Down (1) Ready or Not (1) Ready To Wear (1) Really stupid people (1) Rebbie Jackson - Centipede (1) Recommended Viewing (5) Reginald Hudlin (1) Relationships (2) Religion (1) RenĆ© Syler (1) repost (1) Revolutionary Women (1) Rick Astley - Never Gonna Give You Up (1) Righteous Brothers - Unchained Melody (1) Rihanna (2) Rio de Janeiro (3) Rio de Janeiro at night (1) Rissi Palmer (1) Robert Palmer - Addicted To Love (1) Roberta Flack Donny Hathaway (1) Robin Roberts (1) Rock (1) Rockefeller Center (1) Rockers Revenge - Walking On Sunshine (1) Rockwell - Somebody's Watching Me (1) Roll (1) Roy Ayers - Everybody Loves The Sunshine (1) Roy Ayers - Running Away (1) Rudy Giuliani (1) Rupert Holmes - Escape (The PiƱa Colada Song) (1) Rutgers (2) Saartjie Baartman (1) Sade Adu (5) Saint John Coltrane Church (1) Sally-Ann Roberts (1) Samoa (1) San Diego (1) San Diego At Night (1) San Francisco (4) San Francisco at night (1) San Juan (1) Santa Barbara (1) Santa Cruz (1) santorini Island (1) SƃO PAULO (1) Sapiosexual (1) Sarita Choudhury (2) Sasha Bratz (1) Saving (1) Scary Spice Mel B (1) schools (1) Scotland (1) Seals and Crofts - Summer Breeze (1) Seattle at Night (2) Secret Weapon - Must Be The Music (1) Self Destruction (1) Seoul at Night (1) Seychelles (1) Shalamar - Night to Remember (1) Sheila E - A Love Bizarre (1) Sheila Escovedo (1) Shirley Bassey (1) Shopping (2) Sideways (1) Silvercup Studios (1) Simon and Garfunkel - The Boxer (1) Sisters from other mothers (1) Skate (1) Slavery (1) Slick Rick - Children's Story (1) Sly and the Family Stone - Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin) (1) smart car (1) Snap - The Power (1) Snow - Informer (1) Social Commentary (1) Social life (1) Songs For MLK Day (4) Songs I Love (209) Sony Television (1) Sophie Okonedo (1) Soul II Soul - Back To Life (1) Soulsonic Force feat. Afrika Bambaataa - Planet Rock (1) South Carolina (1) Soylent Green (1) Spain (1) Special Ed - I Got It Made (1) Special Videos (3) Spelman College (1) Spike Lee (1) Sports (10) Spring (1) St. Valentine's Day (7) Staceyann Chin (1) Starpoint - Object Of My Desire (1) Stepha Henry (1) Stephanie Mills - (You're Putting) A Rush On Me (1) Stetsasonic - Sally (1) Steve Fossett (1) Steve Miller Band - The Joker (1) Stoney Jackson (1) Strafe - Set it off (1) Strait of Hormuz (1) Studies About African America (1) Stuff (4) Subway Stories (1) Summer Rain (1) Sumner Redstone (3) Sunday Fun (1) Sunrise (1) Sunset (1) Super Tuesday (1) Superbowl (1) Surface - Closer Than Friends (1) Suriname (1) Susan Cagle (1) Svörtuloft (1) Sweden (1) Swin Cash (2) Swing Out Sister - Breakout (1) Symphony (1) Syracuse (1) Taj Mahal (1) Talented People I Like (2) Tales from the bus (2) Tanzania (1) Taral Hicks (1) Tears for water by Alicia Keys (1) Tech (1) Teena Marie - Behind The Groove (1) Tel Aviv-Yafo (1) Television (1) Tell Me (1) TEN CITY - DEVOTION (1) Terence Trent D'Arby (Sananda Maitreya) - Wishing Well (1) Terri Lynn Carrington (1) Terror Alerts (1) Terry Lewis (1) test (1) Tevin Campbell - Can We Talk (1) Thanksgiving (2) The 1985 Chicago Bears - The Super Bowl Shuffle (1) The Bevery Hillbillies (1) The Blackbyrds - Walking in Rhythm (1) The Blog Report (5) The Brothers Johnson - Land of Ladies (1) The Daily Voice (1) The Eiffel Tower at night (1) The Family - Screams of Passion (1) the FDA (1) The Fillmore (1) The Four Seasons (1) The Great Barrier Reef (1) The Great Mississippi Flood Of 1927 (1) The Happy Go Lucky Bachelor. Aaron McGruder (1) The Human Race (2) The Isley Brothers Voyage To Atlantis (1) The Jones Girls - You Gonna Make Me Love Somebody Else (1) The Neville Brothers (1) The Nile (1) The Police (1) The Roots - The Seed 2.0 (1) The Scream by Edvard Munch (1) The Shades of Love - Keep in Touch (Body To Body) (1) The Stylistics - People Make The World Go Round (1) The Supremes - Merry Christmas (1) The System - You Are In My System (1) The Twin Towers (1) The U.S. from space (1) The Ukraine (1) The Walt Disney Company (1) The Whispers - And The Beat Goes On (1) The White Stripes - Icky Thump (1) Then and Now (2) There But For The Grace of God Go I (1) There is no place like home (1) These Boots Are Made For Walkin' (1) Thompson Twins - Lies (1) Thoughts (73) Tiger Woods (1) Time Inc (1) TimeWarner (1) Timex Social Club - Rumors (1) TLC Unpretty (1) TLC - No Scrubs (1) Toledo Spain (1) Tom Ridge (1) Toni Braxton - Unbreak My Heart (1) Toronto at night (1) Toulouse (1) Track and Field (5) Tradition Of Excellence (1) Training Day (1) Transistor Radio (1) Travelling (2) Trinidad and Tobago (1) Try Again (1) Tupac Changes (1) Turks and Caicos (1) TV Theme Songs (1) Twofer Tuesday (4) Twofer Tuesday: Battle of the Classic Slow Jams - Reasons vs. Love T.K.O (1) Twofer Tuesday: Chaka Khan vs. Mary J Blige - Sweet Thing (1) Twofer Tuesday: I Shot The Sheriff : Bob Marley vs. Eric Clapton (1) Twofer Tuesday: I'll be there - Mariah vs. Michael (1) Twofer Tuesday: Lauryn Hill vs. Roberta Flack (1) Twofer Tuesday: Love Won't Let Me Wait - The Original or The Cover (1) Tyler Perry (1) U.S. Army Cover - Up (1) UCONN (1) Ugly Betty (1) Unbelievably sarcastic post (1) Undercover Black Man (2) Unknown Location (3) USA Today (1) Utah (1) Van Hool (1) Van Morrison Moondance (1) Vancouver BC (1) Varadero Cuba (1) Vaughn Mason and Crew - Bounce (1) Vegetarianism (1) Venice Italy At Night (1) Vermont (1) Veronica Cambell (1) Veronica Webb (2) Veterans Day (1) Viacom (3) Vicente Guerrero (1) Vikter Duplaix - Make A Baby (1) Violence Against African American Women (2) Violence Against Women Of Color (2) Violence On Campus (1) Virgin Islands (1) Vivaldi (1) Volkswagen (1) Volvo C30 (1) Vote (1) Wacky Wednesday: Songs with "I Like" in the tittle (1) Wanderlust (1) Waris Dirie (2) Washington Square Park (4) What About Our Daughters (4) What Black Men Think (1) What Columnists are Saying (3) What I'm Listening To This Week (3) What I'm Listening To This Weekend (1) What I'm Listening To Today (63) What I'm Watching This Weekend... (1) What I'm Watching Today (2) What Tami Said (4) What The.... File (2) What's Going On (1) Where is the Love (1) White castle (1) White Rap Music Buyers (1) Who Killed Benazir Bhutto? (1) Who Knew (1) Whodini - Big Mouth (1) Why Black Women Are Angry (1) Will and Jada (1) Will Smith (1) Willow (1) Window Shopping (1) Winter Solstice (1) Wisconsin (1) Wish feat. Fonda Rae - Touch me (all night long) (1) WNBA (4) WNBA Conference Finals (2) WNBA Finals (1) WNBA MVP (1) Woman's European Athelete Of The Year (1) Women (1) Women Leaders (1) Women's Sports (2) Word... (1) Words (5) work (2) Yaz Situation (1) Zanzibar (1) Zap Mama (2) Zhane' (1) Zoe Kravitz (1)

About Me

West Coast, United States
African American, Poet?, Vegetarian, Music lover, Agoraphobic, Social Phobic

My Favorite Poet

My Favorite Poet
Staceyann Chin

My Favorite Track Athlete

My Favorite Track Athlete
Christine Arron