Family Emergency

I have to take another blogging break. This time it has to do with my sister. I have a sister who is a lot older than me and her health has been getting bad over the last year. Her kidneys are failing and she has already had a transplant a little over a year ago.

Apparently her condition is getting worse. So since it's really just me and my sister, we have siblings from our dad's second and third marriages (long story) but I am her only whole sibling. So I'm going to visit her. My sister and I aren't close at all but maybe this is a chance for us to change that.

I don't know exactly how long I'm going to be gone. I suppose I will stay as long as my sister needs me.

And a word of warning, my sister's kidney failure is due to high blood pressure, so if you have HBP please manage it and if it's in your family please avoid getting it.

Anyway I'm going to be leaving this weekend. I have a friend of a friend who is going to house sit for me. I'm really happy about that. Initially I'm going to be taking vacation time from work and if need be I have a bunch of sick time I can use. I'm really lucky I work for a non-profit, I don't make as much as I could elsewhere but the benefits are great.

I will be back to blogging when I can. I don't expect all of you to keep checking back constantly so when I return I'll stop by your blogs and let you know I'm back.

Take care and I'm going to miss you all!

Au revoir pour le moment.

A blog interrupted

I haven't taken a break from blogging since this past November and I have decided to take one now. As you may have noticed I post everyday. I love blogging so it is very enjoyable for me to do so but it is also a lot of work.

I take a lot of pride in my blog. I try to make sure that my posts are honest, well thought out and factual. I spend a good amount of time researching for my posts. I really feel as bloggers we have a responsibility to try to get the facts in our posts right.

I also spend a lot of time finding photos for my posts and for the "A Beautiful Picture" posts. It takes a lot time tracking down photos. I am really picky about the photos I select so I have been known to spend an hour searching for just one photo.

My music posts have become a joy for me. I love music and I love sharing music with all of you. Posting music has become a pillar of my blog. But as with most things associated with blogging, finding music takes a lot of time too. I generally post music that I have forgotten about. I guess you may be wondering how I find music that I have forgotten about? Well it's possible but not easy. Once again it requires a lot of researching. I spend a lot of time stumbling around the internet for songs and then try to find them on YouTube. But it's worth it! I love finding a song I haven't heard in a really long time and then sharing it with all of you.

Anyway my point is I spend many hours in front of my pc working on different aspects of my blog. I enjoy every moment of it but I need to take a little break. I just want to relax for a few days and read and comment on all of your blogs and there are a lot of blog archives I want to check out.

And since we are having this little conversation about my blog; I want to let you all know how much I love and appreciate your taking the time to comment on my blog. To me blogging is 50% posting and 50% about the comments. So thank you!

I'm not sure exactly how long of a break I'm going to take. I am totally addicted to blogging so I'm not sure how long I can stand to be away from my blog! I'm going to try though! So I will be back to posting in a few days, more than likely before the week is out.

I'll see you in the comments section of your blogs!

How do you deal with blogger burnout?

Snatching defeat out of the jaws of victory

Ruby Dee and Sidney Poitier in the original film version of A Raisin in the Sun

There is a lot that can be said is negative about the African American experience in America. Many of us face racism, whether blatant or subtle, on a daily basis. The media is constantly showing every negative image of us that it can find or manufacture.

So it's very easy as a blogger to focus on the bad and sometimes not recognize the good even when it's right in front of our faces. I have seen a really good example of people in the blogisphere focusing on the negative when it would have been just as easy and more productive to focus on the positive.

Monday night ABC aired a version of Lorraine Hansberry's classic American drama A Raisin in the Sun. Even before it aired I read many posts decrying it as a travesty. I repeat; that was before the broadcast even aired. Mainly it seemed that people were upset with the choice of Shawn Combs aka P. Diddy to play the role of Walter Lee.

Lorraine Hansberry

While I too believe that Shawn Combs acting ability is suspect at best, I was pleased to look forward to seeing African American faces on network television that would not be the usual stereotypes that we all complain about.

After the TV version aired many people compared ABC's version of A Raisin in the Sun to the original film starring Sidney Poitier, Ruby Dee and others. Sure it's tempting to compare the two but ultimately it's setting the TV version up for failure.

ABC's A Raisin in the Sun

It's not reasonable to compare a film made for theatrical release to one made for TV. There is less money involved in television productions, the talent on and off camera will likely be less experienced and sometimes less talented.

I watched Monday night's airing of A Raisin In The Sun and I was happy to see African Americans portrayed as complicated and thoughtful people. To see such portrayals is rare indeed on the small screen or even on the big screen.

We are fed a constant diet of comedy and buffoonery on TV. We see African Americans portrayed as criminals, and usually stupid criminals, whores, rappers and miscreants.

So I celebrate ABC's version of A Raisin In The Sun. Will it win any Emmy Awards? Likely not but it was an island of realness in a sea of stereotypes.

And for that I say bravo!

Hopefully all the negative chatter about the movie will not prevent other networks, either cable or broadcast, from stepping outside the norm and producing more films that tell unique slices of African American life.

ABC's A Raisin in the Sun was a victory, it was a victory for those of us who are tired of what's on BET and VH1 and rap videos and Tyler Perry films (that mock Black women). It's just too bad that many people were so busy looking for a defeat that they missed the victory.

Did you watch A Raisin in the Sun on ABC Monday Night?

What did you think of it?

I tried to kick... but that sh*t just be callin' me man, it be callin' me, man...

My plan for today was to take a day off from blogging. I made plans to go to a local flea market with a friend and then maybe to a movie or late lunch. But like Pookie in the film New Jack City says "it be callin' me", blogging that is.

What a weird feeling it was for me to consider something as simple as not posting anything today. Since I started blogging this past August I have only missed three days of blogging. That was when I took a trip to see a friend.

Other wise I am compelled to blog. It's as much apart of my daily routine as taking a shower. I can't go a day with out a shower and apparently I can't go a day without blogging.

In a little while I'll get ready to go flea marketing. The weather is supposed to be nice and I hope to find some really nice deals. Maybe I'll find a few dvd's or another backpack to add to my collection.

Anyway it's still pretty early so I guess I'll see what's going on with my favorite blogs this morning.

So this is my version of not blogging, what's yours? Do you have a hard time not blogging too?

On Astrophysics and the Universe...

(Okay this post really isn't really about Astrophysics, I just couldn't figure a good title for this post.)

Here is what it's really about.

What do you do when you like someone a lot and you over time get the feeling that they don't really like you? I have a feeling that someone I really like and admire, for some reason doesn't really like me. I feel like she only tolerates me because we travel in the same circles.

I've gone out of may way on several occasions to let her know that I think she is a really great person. And I do think she's a great person.

So does she think of me as a sycophant?

Recently I noticed that she has embraced certain people who I am close to but she still makes it clear in a very subtle way that she doesn't want to embrace me in that same way.

So I'm sad and hurt. I've invested a lot of time in the relationship, such as it is, and feel cheated. Yesterday I came to the conclusion that I should simply back off.

I feel like I have been pushing myself on her and that's a terrible feeling.

I really hate how I'm feeling. On the one hand I feel childish. I feel childish because I feel jealous. I feel as though this person has gotten close to a few people that I may have introduced her to and now I'm being shunned.

Anyway I needed to vent. I needed to say something about this because it is really bothering me.

Thanks for listening.

Do you think I'm being stupid and childish? Should I talk to her about this or just back-off?

The Chudney Ross Experience: (Part two) Chudney stops by!

"I’m a girl who likes to enjoy the good things in life / a pleasure seeker above all else. If is doesn’t make me smile, feel joy or laugh till my stomachaches, what’s the point?" - Chudney Ross


Update: I originally posted this on December 15; but yesterday I received a wonderful comment from Chudney Ross! So I thought I would re-post it because I'm excited about receiving a comment from Chudney. Just click on comments to see hers.

Chudney Ross is Diana Ross' youngest daughter and Tracee Ellis Ross' little sister. She's also a model, socialite and blogger.

I love Chudney Ross' blog because it allows me to live vicariously through her posts about her jet set lifestyle. I've read her posts about travelling to the Far East, attending Fashion Weeks in New York and in L.A. I've enjoyed reading about her shopping exploits from Hong Kong to L.A. I get to go along on the red carpet and to the best restaurants.

Chudney has a fun bubbly personality that brightens my day. Every time I read Chudney's blog I feel like I've been on a mini vacation.

Need a little vacation? Check out Chudney's blog. See it here: Chudney Ross

On Blogging while working

Click on comic for large view

I blog everyday at work, that is I blog surf while working. I don't usually post any thing while I'm at work unless there is some sort of news story. I also usually don't respond to comments at work. I like to take my time responding to comments on my blog, so I wait until I get home.

My blogging pattern from work is usually me going to a particular blog, taking a peek then going back to read a post and then going back to comment. Sometimes I'll visit a blog 5 or 6 times during the workday before I'm able to read everything I want to read.

I have my own office so there isn't anyone looking over my shoulder per se but I have people constantly coming in an out of my office. I don't really want everyone at work knowing I'm blog surfing so I usually minimize the page I'm on when someone walks in.

I used to get frustrated about having to visit a blog 5 or 6 times before I got to read what I wanted. Now though I'm used to it. In fact now that's my pattern at home too. I'm usually doing something else even at home while I blog surf. So I still duck in and out of a particular blog.

Also I get distracted by the links at a blog. So I'll start to read a post then I might see an interesting link and click on it, read a little there and then click on another link. Before I know it I'm 10 blogs away from the original blog I was reading. Then I have to go all the way back and finish reading that blog. But that's a really good way to find interesting new blogs.

I also find new blogs in the comments. If I see a comment that stands out I'll usually check to see if that person has a blog.

No one at work knows that I have a blog. If they did then they would want to see it. And then I'd have to censor what I say on my blog. So since I really want my blog to be a place where I can just be me and be honest, I just don't tell them.

It would be so weird to have someone from work comment on my blog!

And I haven't even told my friends I have a blog. I would feel weird about them reading my blog, it's my little personal space. Also If I want to talk about a particular relationship I might not feel comfortable doing so if people that I see everyday were reading my blog.

What's your blog surfing pattern? Do you surf at work? Do your co-workers know that you have a blog? And do your friends know?

Fancy meeting you here

So there I am, on some deserted street way in the outer reaches of the blogisphere. Very proud of myself that I've found this really obscure but interesting blog. I read the posts and then decide to comment.

And what do I see in the comments? I see someone from my blog family!

I run into my blog family all over the place. It's really amazing sometimes. I suppose we enjoy the same sort of things and are drawn to the same blogs, no matter how far out in the blogisphere they are.

Do you notice this too?

Here is a little story...

I decided to go for a walk. My friend Eva says walking is the best exercise. What Tami said was she likes to walk in the evening, she's my other good pal.

I think one of the reasons Why Black Women Are Angry is that they don't walk enough.

So I grabbed my ipod, threw a scarf around my neck and headed out the door. Walking makes me feel like I'm Getting A Life! And what a great day for a walk, a sunny crisp fall day. I had to hurry though because I didn't want to miss my favorite radio program which is broadcast Live From Israel. I heard about the show in Los Angelista's Guide To The Pursuit Of Happiness.

As I began my walk I had to cross the street because one of my neighbors has a huge rottweiler that likes to growl at passers-by. Once across the street I picked up my pace. I decided I would walk toward the Bay. I love the bay breeze!

As I was heading down the street a car went by blowing it's horn, at first I couldn't figure out who it was. The I realized it was Just Lisa and I waved. She was riding with a Light-Skinned-ed Girl whom I didn't recognize.

Then I saw a blimp flying really low. It had a message sign on it that read Hochmah and Musar. I wondered what that meant?

I headed west toward the bay and crossed the avenue where I saw a guy bopping down the street. He looked like the proverbial Happy-Go-Lucky Bachelor. He smiled as he passed and said "You look like a Boring Black Chick". How rude I thought! I wondered why he would say such a thing to me. After all he didn't know a thing about me and my so-called FABULOUS Life.

Whatever, it was much too nice a day to dwell on some strangers words. As far as I was concerned he could go somewhere and Eat Mangoes Nekkid! So there.

Why do people who don't even know you think that they can speak to you like they are some sort of Essential Presence in your life?

I picked up my pace. It was colder out than I thought. I was also enjoying my ipod. I decided to pump up the volume a bit but a woman stopped me saying some thing. I guess when a Brown Girl Speaks you just have to listen. I turned the volume down and she asked me if I was trying to lose weight. I said I suppose it wouldn't hurt. Then she asked me for a dollar. She said "Give A Lot, Lose A Lot." I laughed as I reached in my backpack and gave her a dollar.

She thanked me and said here is some advice; " Don't watch too much TV, Just Put The Remote Down! But that's just Things According To Me!"

I decided if I didn't say goodbye and walk away she would talk to me for the next hour. As I walked away she reached into her pocket and pulled out a flag which she started waving. I'm not sure why she decided to display Homeland Colors but why not!

I continued toward the Bay and could smell the salt in the air. As I passed a bus stop bench I saw a book, it was tittled The TransGriot. I picked it up and noticed another book called Character Corner, what an interesting title I thought. I started to put them in my backpack but figured the rightful owner might come back looking for them.

Only a few blocks to go. I could see the Bay now. It sparkled and shimmered in the fall sun. I picked up my pace again. I passed the Pomegranate Queen selling her beautiful pomegranates.

Then I finally reached the bay! It was so beautiful. I sat on a bench and listened to my music and just enjoyed the beautiful view!

(I know what you're thinking; what a silly little story. Well maybe it was but I hope it made you smile! Happy Friday & Happy Holidays!)

On Crazy Comments

I surf blogs almost everyday. I'm always looking for new blogs to read. Honestly though out of every twenty blogs I see, maybe one looks interesting.

And when I 'm not "feeling" a particular blog I usually see at least one post that looks interesting. So I settle in and read the post and if the post is good then I might check out the comments.

Sometimes though when I click to open the comment form I find myself wading into a bunch of craziness. Have you ever read through the comments section on a blog and thought, what the ____! I have seen the craziest stuff in comments sections.

Honestly some people should forget the posts on their blog and just post the comments. I've seen amazing arguments. I've seen people trying to get their "rap" on, which is really crazy. I've seen boyfriends warning men to watch their comments on their girlfriend's blog. No kidding. I've seen people promoting their Cd's. All sorts of crazy stuff.

And none of that compares to the crazy racist comments I've seen. I mean what do racists do; just lurk around the blogisphere all day looking for a chance to make a racist comment?

And if you think racist comments on blogs are bad, check the comments on mainstream media sites. Oh my! The racists really hit full stride on those sites.

Have you ever heard the saying "follow a dumb kid home and you'll find a dumb parent"? Well that may be true with kids but it's not always true with commenters.

Just last night I went to one of my favorite blogs and decided to read the comments on a post. There was only one comment and it was nothing out of the ordinary. Anyway I decided to check out that persons blog. OMG! I felt like I accidentally walked into a Klan meeting!

By the way for those of you who think that some White people don't sit around watching Maury Povich and thinking all Black people are like that, you should have seen the post this person wrote about Black people who appear on that show. It was eye opening.

But the weirdest comments by far come from "anonymous" commenters. No offense to Anonymous commenters in general, I mean I hate to stereotype all anonymous commenters, but; Why are anonymous bloggers always (ahem) usually contrarians? They USUALLY have some oddball thing to say that goes totally against the flow of the other comments.

Again, no offense intended to the Anonymous commenters who may read this. I'm sure you're not like that. (cough)

But seriously I'm not knocking the anonymous commenters on my blog, they have been really nice. A couple have even given me some great information.

I suppose that bloggers set the tone of their comments by how they respond to comments. So maybe it all can't be blamed on the commenters. But what ever the cause people really need to get a hold of themselves. Very rarely is the comments conversation even that serious.

Comment arguments usually start over something really inane. Like one person makes a comment about some celebrity which offends someone else and, ding, ding, the fight is on.

When ever I find myself in one of these crazy comments sections, no matter how much I want to comment on the post, I usually just slowly back the heck out of there. I'm afraid if I leave a comment some of the crazy commenters might follow me back to my blog!

Blogs yes, CNN no

For a very long time I have felt that corporate media has not covered stories that were important to me. I'm not interested in Paris Hilton (I feel icky just typing her name), I'm not interested in the latest missing White woman (mostly because missing women who look like me are ignored) and I'm not interested in stories that are meant to distract all of us from the important issues of the day.

Blogs have become to me what CNN might be for other people. Every morning as I start my day I read blogs to get 90% of the information I need to feel informed for the day. It's information that is tailored to my needs. It so amazing the news and information that I get reading blogs. If it's important someone will be writing about it.

I think blogs are the major Black media of the new century. Blogs are at this point the only major news sources that are completely Black owned. We don't have a nationally distributed newspaper, we don't have a national talk and news radio network and we don't have a nationally broadcast t.v. station. BET as I'm sure you know is owned by Viacom and TV ONE although founded by a Black woman is only partly Black owned. Comcast Cable and DirecTV share ownership with Radio One. So there are no nationally available news and information sources owned and operated by African Americans except blogs!

Blogs have filled the void.

In just a few years blogs have taken the top spot as purveyors of news and information of interest to many African Americans. Everyday thousands of blogs authored by African Americans and Black people from around the world cover just about every topic under the sun.

You can read about family, economics, music, quilting, sports, education, politics, dating, marriage, kids, films, music, activism, the list goes on and on!

Blogs have become an integral part of my life. I just can't imagine starting my day without reading and surfing the blogisphere. I can't even comprehend that there was a time before blogs? I think and hope that the blogisphere will continue to expand and become even more important. It is to me the most amazing form of media to come along since the t.v. and in my life it has totally replaced the t.v.

Blogs have become my mainstream media

What percentage of news and information do you get from blogs?

Photo Attribution: VK Red

Tinkering with the template...

I arrived home from my trip too exhausted to sit still. So I decided to change the template on my blog and I made a few other changes. I'm now using the wide template. I changed the color scheme just a bit and deleted a few things from the side bar. I think I like the changes but I probably won't be sure for a few days.

Hello...is anybody home?

Do you come across abandoned blogs? I'm not talking about the ones that people set up just to have a blogger account to comment. I'm talking about blogs that have lots of posts and then they just stop. You start reading a post and then look at the date and think what the ....! I find them all the time. It's so strange. The posts just stop! kaput!

It's like finding an abandoned house with a hot dinner still on the table and music playing on the stereo. I always wonder what happened. Was there some sort of tragic event? A broken heart? Carpal tunnel? What would happen to make someone just stop blogging with no explanation? These aren't situations where someone is just taking a few weeks off. I'm talking about finding a blog that hasn't been touched in months or a year or more.

Some of the blogs are really interesting too. I've seen abandoned blogs with very well thought out posts on intriguing topics. One would think that at least there would be a goodbye post. An explanation as to why the blogger has decided to give it up.

It's weird and a little sad and always makes me curious when I see a blog abandoned.

Photo Attribution: Tonya Poole

Why I Decided To Blog

I've thought about blogging for quite some time. But for some reason I never took the step. I just kept putting the thought aside. Then over the last several months I began to read more blogs. I read them almost every day and over time those blogs inspired me.

Blogs like What About Our Daughters and Why Black Women Are Angry. Those particular blogs really impressed me. I have been continually amazed at What About Our Daughters has been able to do, by alerting all of us who read the blog to important issues. But I've been even more amazed at the accomplishments made. Just recently after derogatory comments by a supposed writer at XXL magazine's website about the woman who was brutally attacked at Dunbar village, What About Our Daughters contacted sponsors and alerted them. The result was several pulling their advertising!

The thing I really like about Why Black Women Are Angry are the words of inspiration. Like a post reminding us all not to give up no matter how bad things get.

I was also inspired by blogs such as Lisa C Writes, Home Girl and Los Angelista's Guide To The Pursuit Of Happiness. I enjoy reading their thoughts on various subjects. Like a post from Los Angelistia's Guide To Happiness about her experience standing in line at a post office. Or the braveness of the blogger TranGriot to post about her experiences as a Transgendered woman.

All in all these blogs and others have added to my life in very real ways. A while back when What About Our Daughters was protesting BET's Hot Ghetto Mess aka We Got To Do Better, for the first time in my life I wrote my Congressperson asking her to support ala cart cable. (Back when I had cable)

I'm not sure if anyone will actually even read my blog and if anyone does I certainly don't expect to inspire people the way other bloggers do on a daily basis. But I hope that my words will at least, sometimes, cause a few people to think.